Feel like you've just been smacked in the face by a piece of your past? Yep, you're not alone. In fact, we are all dealing with a good case of the Reopening Wound right now. That's how I call it. I thought I should talk to you about this because I'm in the middle of it myself and it does NOT feel good. But it can!
Our emotional scars are just like regular scars on our skin. We wear them on our soul, we identify with them, we are constantly reminded of their origin - and it hurts.
Lately you are feeling especially triggered, but... The past is not coming back to hurt you. It's coming back to heal you more. You may have thought you were okay, you thought you forgave whoever wronged you, perhaps it was yourself and you forgave yourself. You may have said a good number of times "I'm over it." But were you, really? Are we ever completely over things? I want to tell you to own your past, to reclaim it, but because I've been trying desperately to own mine, to take responsibility, to stop blaming others, I know how fucking hard it is. You can't just say it and it's done. It's not true. It takes courage, commitment, more forgiveness.
In the meantime you have to be okay with the past returning from time to time. It will hurt, but only momentarily. Know that it's coming to make peace with you. It's your unconscious saying "hey, you haven't dealt with this aspect of your pain quite yet. I think you're ready to face it now." And so another level of healing takes place within you. The wound closes again, the skin thickens, the scar grows an extra layer. By recognizing the healing process occurring within you, by acknowledging the signs, you allow peace. You allow strength. You allow the lessons to be learned. You protect yourself from further harm or grief or shame. You know better.